Twas the Wish Before Christmas

Taken from the free ABDL ebook:

The Christmas Wish

here is a little story about dreams coming true … just not how they were expected.

—————

Twas the Wish Before Xmas – 

Christmas Eve, 7:45pm

It was certainly the most wonderful time of the year. And a casual stroll through Pennbrook Mall vividly displayed the season’s mesmerizing effect on all who were there – everybody scrounging to find those extremely last-minute purchases … the people on their lists who were the toughest to shop for and the most difficult for whom to find the right gifts. From the decorations to the lights to the music to the fact that everyone seemed to have the spirit within them, it wasn’t hard to understand why people put off the shopping to the last possible second. There were so many other things about the holidays that were more fun to do. But on this night, the spirit of the season would become more real than could have ever been imagined.

Let It Snow! Let It Snow! Let It Snow! played throughout the mall, some of the candy stores going into the last minute blitz by sending employees out of the stores with sample trays for people to devour. Sale prices doubled in value for the three hours remaining. And it seemed that either a slight hysteria had taken everyone over or that the holiday spirit was moving into full effect.

Whatever the catalyst for it was, the mall seemed to buzz all around her – as if some cosmic force had just convened there. And in the middle of this wondrous atmosphere was Holly, a girl who had turned 25 just a few days ago. She really didn’t need to buy any other presents and her only purpose in being there was … to simply be there. Who wouldn’t want to be in the middle of such a magical happening as was the ambiance in the mall that night?

Perhaps the only other place she really wanted to be just then was with her boyfriend, Cole. But his family decided to travel out of town to spend Christmas with some relatives who lived three states away. So, Holly would spend Christmas with her parents and four grandparents. While she would miss Cole tomorrow, she didn’t scoff at the idea of spending Christmas with her folks or at the fact that she was 25 and all four of her grandparents were still alive. Some blessings always needed to be regarded as such. Not everyone could say that all of their grandparents saw them graduate both undergrad and graduate schools.

From the corner of her eye she saw The Little Boutique, an absolutely adorable jewelry and accessories store for little girls. And unable to resist, she walked into it. No, she had no nieces to buy gifts for as she was an only-child. But she could recall when her parents used to bring her into that store when she was young. Well … her mother would always bring her into the store and her father would sit on the bench just outside the store as he didn’t want to be the only guy in there.

The girly trinkets and sparkly shinies filled the racks and the little spindle display thingies and the pastel colors of pink, purple, mint, baby blue and more dazzled anyone who walked by. That boutique alone was magical. And Holly smiled brightly as she walked up to a wall display of Hello Kitty purses. She laughed aloud as she picked up one of them, seeing how tiny it was and remembering a similar little purse her mother bought for her so long ago.

Turning around, she saw the most adorable little baby nightie and she awwed at it audibly. It was so teeny tiny she could hardly imagine a little girl being able to fit into it. Reaching out with both hands, she touched the soft cotton material of the nightie.

And as if she had drug her bare feet across a rug, she got what felt like a static shock. Startling back, she looked at her fingers. Then she looked to the floor, tiled not carpeted. She obviously wasn’t bare foot. So why did she get shocked? That seemed kind of strange.

Wandering back out into the mall, she heard a bustling noise at the center court. And just as curious as everyone else, she walked towards the noise. But her mind was still in that boutique. And as she strolled towards the hubbub, she drifted back to a point in her life when little seemed more like what she was all about, like all that she knew.

What Holly had never told anyone was that there was some sort of magic about her childhood that she dearly missed, a constant influx of white-hot attention from everyone that was so wonderfully inundating she missed it more than she could put to words. As an adult, no one ever treated her like that anymore. Her boyfriend was wonderful to her, loving and caring and supportive. But not even he could give her that feeling of glorious white-hot attention she knew when she was young. There was no way he could know. There was no way anyone could know. She had never told anyone.

But the charm of being a BabyGirl again was so ever-present in her mind, it had become a constant fantasy for her. Even though that 50 Shades movie had opened up a lot of people’s curiosities to the point where they began to finally explore a bit, Holly hadn’t opened her heart like that. And it seemed unlikely she ever would.

Besides, the 50 Shades movie showed a darker side to something less than usual, something less than … vanilla. She didn’t want any of that. But oh, to be treated like a little girl again – with all the outfits, trinkets, pacifiers, blankets, teddy bears, plates and cups that were just for her, the nightlights, the bubble baths, the hair clips, the stickers, the cartoons, the toys … and yes, the diapers. Well … there were some things that would forever retain a very special place inside her heart.

As an adult, she could never hope for such spoiling and pampering as she used to receive. Even as an only-child to two parents who were also only-children, she didn’t often have free time in life to fantasize as she received all the attention she could handle from her parents and grandparents. It just wasn’t the same as when she was young.

And Cole? Well, she would be way too embarrassed to ever tell him, let alone to ask him to baby her.

Some things were best left as fantasy, the same place where the whole Princess meeting the Prince fairy tale belonged as well.

Getting to the center court, she saw that ruckus was coming from the area where Santa Clause was sitting. An announcement had been made that Santa would be leaving soon as he needed to prepare for his many trips all over the world that night. And when this announcement was made, people flocked to get in line.

Holly stood there, watching the young and the old sit on Santa’s lap as they all spoke of what they wanted for Christmas. She remembered when her grandparents took her to sit on Santa’s lap. And that remembrance led her thoughts back to the BabyGirl fantasy.

She never understood where it came from or when it first entered her mind. It had just always been there in her thoughts, it seemed – like she was born a BabyGirl and she never wanted to be anything but that her whole life.

Holly wasn’t a bed wetter any later than the usual age when a girl got over bed wetting. She didn’t have a weak bladder. So there were no random accidents from stress or the like. But she was always excitable and when excited, she didn’t always pay attention. Those were the moments when she would tinkle in her panties a little. This had happened all of her life. And maybe it was the embarrassment from it that strengthened the BabyGirl thoughts within her enough to make them fantasies for her.

She stood there for a half hour, sharing the delight of everyone who believed in Santa. And she stayed there until the line emptied, everyone waving goodbye to him as he left. Then the head “elf” spoke up, announcing a station would be left open where there would be crayons and construction paper for anyone who wanted to write a Dear Santa letter to the Jolly guy. And when Santa’s sleigh flew over the mall later that night, he would stop in and get all the letters written to him – promising to have anything delivered that was asked for by morning.

Holly smiled brightly, too charmed to help herself. So she walked up to the table, got a piece of pink construction paper, folded it in half, picked up a purple crayon and sat down – writing a letter to Santa for a Christmas wish she knew would be as real as he was.

Dear Santa,

Hi! It’s Holly. I know I haven’t written you a letter in a long, long time. I’m sorry about that. I was too busy growing up and forgetting everything that you taught me about believing when no one else did.

I’m also sorry to say that I grew up a bit too much, that is, to say that my heart is still very young, but my college degrees mean I have to wave bye bye to the fantasies now.

But I thought I would ask you for a Christmas wish that came straight from the center of my little heart.

Could you make it possible for me to feeling all those wonderful feelings I had when I was little, very little? And for one day, could I be the BabyGirl I used to be again?

Sincerely,

Holly
xoxo

She smiled, reading over her letter to Santa before getting up and walking it over the North Pole Mail slot. And when she slipped the letter into the slot, she got a shock to her finger tips again – dropping the letter into the mailbox. Stepping back, she rubbed her right thumb against her pointer and middle finger tips. It didn’t hurt so much as it startled her.

Thinking nothing more of it, she made her way to the exit, then doubling back quickly to the bathroom in the food court as the sudden urge to pee overtook her bladder. Sitting on the toilet, she thought how strange it was that she suddenly had a full bladder. She hadn’t drunk anything in quite a few hours.

When she finished, she washed her hands and then made her way towards the exit again, getting a bit further this time before an unknown impulse took her back to The Little Boutique store. With no real understanding of why she was doing it, Holly bought that cute little baby nightie, then taking it over to the Salvation Army box in the center court of the mall and dropping the nightie into it. No, maybe no little girl would receive that nightie on Christmas morning. But some little girl eventually would get it. That was really all that mattered.

And then, the third time was the charm. Holly made it through the exit and zipped up the front of her winter coat. It seemed the snow hadn’t fallen for Christmas Eve, but the winds were sure whipping through the area.

Perhaps they should’ve played a song called Let It Blow! Let It Blow! Let It Blow!

Getting into her car and heading for home, Holly kept feeling that strange sensation in her fingertips from the shock she received when she touched the baby night in the boutique as well as when she dropped her letter to Santa in that Christmas mailbox. And those little memories made her mind drift back once again into yet another fantasy about being a BabyGirl again.

It never hurt to dream about it. There were no thought police in this world. And besides, she wasn’t doing anything wrong. She had never acted on it, anyway. She had no diapers or pacifiers or cute outfits at home. She did have a teddy bear, but that was it.

The whole way home, she thought about those fond memories from when she was young and how wonderful they made her feel even now, just in thought. Pulling up to a red light, she stared up at the stars in the clear December sky.

Focusing in on one particular star for its brightness, she saw herself in a nursery … it was her nursery.

She was kneeling inside her crib and resting her chin on her hands as her forearms were resting on the top of the side railing of the crib. She was nursing on a pacifier and her hair was tied up in pigtails. She was dressed in a tiny little white top and in a tiny little diaper. And she was looking to the door of the nursery, waiting for her Daddy to come in and get her out of the crib as she knew that her nap time was soon over. But she couldn’t sleep anymore. There was so much fun to be had, so much love to show her Daddy and so much attention to absorb that sleeping any longer would only be a waste of her time.

Then the car behind her honked as the red light had gone green. Snapping out of her daze, Holly drove the rest of the way home. She had had that particular daydream before and though she never saw who her Daddy was in the dream, she always believed that it was Cole.

Oh, Cole. Why did your family force you to go along with them? Who flies on Christmas Eve anyway? But Holly looked forward to his return flight on the morning of December 26th. The two of them would celebrate Christmas together then.

And that would suit Holly just fine.

—————

Christmas Eve, 11pm

Getting out of the shower, Holly dried herself with a towel and then wrapped her wet hair in another towel. Making her way downstairs, she went to the laundry room and got all the laundry out of the dryer. It was kind of irritating that she had to parent-proof the house before her relatives came over. If she didn’t, if she left a single dish in the sink or a single sock in the washer, her mother would be up one side of her and down the other – quicker than a jack rabbit in heat.

Holly could understand why her mother was so particular about how Holly kept the house she lived in. After all, the house used to belong to Holly’s mother’s parents. And her mother grew up in that home. As her maternal grandparents grew older, they down-sized their living situation to accommodate their age. But instead of selling the house, they gave it to their only grandchild, Holly – their pride and joy who had just completed graduate school. Oh, they were so proud of her.

Holly folded all her laundry and put it into a basket, then hanging up in the laundry room the red Christmas dress her mother had bought her. Folding that dress would’ve been like asking her mother to disown her.

Making her way upstairs with the basket of laundry, she stopped by the guest room – peeking in and remembering how she used to sleep in that guest room when she would spend the night with her grandparents. And it was always fun to sleep in that room because when her mother was young, that guest room used to be her bedroom.

Walking into the main bedroom, Holly let her hair out of the towel and slipped into a New York Yankees baseball jersey. It was the perfect night shirt and she loved the Yankees – even though her favorite heart-throb, Derek Jeter, had retired. Slipping into a pair of white panties, she climbed into bed – making a final mental checklist in preparation for the Christmas day to come. She double-checked in her thoughts to make certain that she had tucked all the shoelaces inside her sneakers – lest her anal mother see such an atrocity out in the open.

Taking in a deep breath and sighing, she closed her eyes and laid down – all of her fingers now feeling that strange, tingly sensation from when she got shocked at the mall. And that tingly sensation drifted her mind back one more time to all the fantasies that had filled her head that evening.

In 12 hours, at 11am, her parents and all four grandparents would be there. Putting her sleeping mask on, she settled in – smiling one more time at the thought of that silly letter she wrote to Santa.

How magical it would be to be a BabyGirl again … for one single day.

How silly she was to think of such a thing.

Oh, how she wished Cole could’ve been there with her.

Hugging her teddy bear, she fell asleep, contented with all the blessings in her life.

But when she woke up that next morning …

Christmas Morning

Holly awoke on her tummy, smiling as brightly as her grogginess would allow. It was Christmas morning and though she wouldn’t see her beloved Cole until tomorrow … it was still a glorious morning and would be a glorious day. But there wasn’t anything unusual about the day. The weather wasn’t perfect. It never was at the tail end of December. Even if there wasn’t snow outside, turning everything into a beautiful winter wonderland, there would still be bitter cold winds – always those bone-chilling gusts everywhere. The day was no longer than any other and it was one of the shortest amounts of daylight in the whole calendar year. No, there was nothing actually perfect about Christmas at all.

So, why was Christmas morning always heralded and why was the cliché: every morning should be like Christmas morning such a truthful statement?

Because it was the one day of the year everybody looked forward to, the one day of the year people spent more time preparing for than any other, the one day of the year when happiness was paramount and the one day of the year when details and precision and perfection were attempted by all. Everything didn’t always work out on Christmas morning, but that really didn’t matter. All that did matter was that everybody tried, for one day of the year.

Holly couldn’t see how bright the bedroom was for still having the sleeping mask on, but she could feel how warm the morning sun had made the room. It was probably why her grandparents chose that particular bedroom as their own for all the years they lived there.

She tried to reach up to take the sleeping mask off, but her arms were completely numb – from elbows to finger tips, still tucked underneath her. Ugh! She had such a bad habit of sleeping on her arms. This always happened when she went to sleep on her tummy. Some nights, she would go to sleep while lying on her back. By morning, however, she had always flipped over. And as usual, on this morning too, she couldn’t move her arms. But it didn’t really bother her. It was Christmas morning. Nothing could bother her on this day.

So she remained there for a minute or two, beginning to wiggle her fingers as much as she could to get the movement back in them. And softly laughing, she wondered what outfit her mother’s parents would get her this year. That always seemed to be the present from that set of grandparents, yet another outfit of clothing she would never wear – except when they were around, of course.

Laughing as she thought of what some of the past outfits were, Holly turned over onto her back – her numb forearms flopping to either of her sides. But just then, a most curious crinkling noise accompanied her movements. What on Earth was that? Remaining very still, she listened for the noise again, but didn’t hear it anymore. Thinking nothing of it, she began flexing her fingers fully, touching them to her palms again and again in an effort to get some amount of feeling going. This was kind of ridiculous how long it was taking her arms to get over the numbness of having been slept on. She did have to get up soon and get ready as her parents and grandparents would be there at 11am.

Ugh! This was getting a little frustrating now. Shifting in her position, she suddenly heard that crinkling noise again. Lifting her head up, she listened for it a little more carefully. This wasn’t a noise in her mind. She was definitely hearing something. Slowly, she pulled herself up into a sitting position and finally her arms began to tingle with that horrible needlepoint feeling. But it was always a sign that she would have use of her arms and hands again in just a few moments.

She really needed to find a way to tie her hands down when she slept to prevent herself from lying on them. Laughing at the thought, she began to move her legs towards the side of the bed to then stand up, but she heard the crinkling noise again. So she stopped moving to listen for it again … and besides, her legs weren’t working very well either.

Okay … what was going on? Now she was beginning to get a little worried. Had she suffered a stroke of some sort in her sleep? But as if the fates decided to take pity on her, the needles finally stopped pricking the surface of her arms. And as movement returned to them, she lifted her hands up to her face. Slipping her thumbs up the bridge of her nose, she fumbled her fingers to get them all to work together as he slid the sleeping mask up off her eyes and onto her forehead. The room was really bright and she closed her eyes, rubbing them for a minute as she yawned. Then she opened her eyes, but what she saw made her blink a few more times and rub her eyes again in disbelief.

There was no crinkling noise in the room – in the form of some plastic bag she might have left on the bed or whatever. The crinkling noise was coming from her waist.

Holly was wearing a diaper with butterflies on the front of the waistband. What the …? She didn’t have any diapers in the house. This wasn’t funny anymore. Looking at her front, her eyes grew even bigger and wider at what she saw next. Carefully, placing her palms flat to the mattress, she stared down at the cute little baby nightie on her torso. What happened to the Yankees jersey she put on last night?

The questions kept filling her mind. But wait a minute! Hold on! The nightie looked surprisingly similar to the one she bought at the mall last night and put into the Salvation Army collection box. Then intent was for that nightie to go to some little girl somewhere. And what she was wearing was large enough to fit her. It couldn’t have been the same one from the mall. Or could it have been?

Had she actually bought the nightie and then dreamt up the part when she put it in the Salvation Army box?

Her confusion grew paramount and turned to paranoia. Was somebody in the house? Who? And why did they dress her like this? Her eyes welled up with tears as she stared down at the nightie and the diaper on her body. But the mysteries kept coming as, through her teary eyesight, she saw wooden bars around her.

Then it dawned on her. She wasn’t sitting on the queen-sized bed her grandparents left for her. She was sitting in a white crib. And this crib seemed huge. The bedsheets and comforter were pink, not the usual ones – the ones with the Thomas Kincade lighthouse prints on them, the ones her mother bought her a few months ago. But why was she in a crib? Where was the bed? What the … ?

This was just getting weirder and weirder by the minute.

She tried to stand up but couldn’t. Now what was wrong with her legs? Looking up at the top of the side railing, she saw the latches that were holding it up. Struggling but managing to get up onto her knees, she shuffled over to the side railing and reached up to the latch on the left side. But her fingers had no coordination and she grew frustrated quickly – then clenching the bars of the side railing and shaking them to get it to lower. She found no avail. Sitting back down, she sobbed uncontrollably.

But the shocks just kept coming. Looking through the crib bars, she could see that the entire bedroom had been transformed into a nursery. There was a changing table and several other things that seemed foreign. The dresser was still the same and everything else seemed in place – except for the closet doors. She always left them open, but presently, they were closed.

Then her imagination really started to get the best of her. What if the person who broke into her house, diapered her, put her in a nightie, changed the furniture in her bedroom and put her in that crib was waiting inside the closet for her? Fear welled up inside her and she felt a warm wetness gathering between her legs.

What? Was she wetting herself? She hadn’t done that since she was a little girl. And she suddenly had to pee so badly that she couldn’t stop. It came gushing out her as if she hadn’t peed in a week, flooding her diaper quickly and swelling the material inside it. For as alarming as all of this was, an empty bladder felt a lot better than a full one. But seriously now, what the … ?

And no. There wasn’t some burglar who broke in, made all these changes and was now waiting for her in the closet. There was a logical explanation for all of this and it was a lot simpler than the version conjured up by her over-active imagination. She was still dreaming. And she was going to prove it to herself, right then – so all of this mysteriousness would stop, this bizarre dream would end and she would wake up a little later on Christmas morning.

Reaching down to her legs, she pinched the top of both of her thighs, jumping a little at how painful the pinches were. She wasn’t expecting to feel the pinches at all. She truly believed that she was dreaming all of this, but she was wrong. It was actually happening.

Then the greatest shock of all came. Looking through the crib bars, she saw her alarm clock on the dresser, the time reading 10:47am on the digital display.

Oh, no. Everyone would be arriving very soon! Her relatives were never late. In a panic, she began wetting herself again, her bladder not having been as empty as she thought. Not waiting for the pee to end, she got up onto her knees – shuffling back over to the side railing again.

There wasn’t a minute to waste. Grabbing hold of the top of the side railing, she lifted herself up – finding a way to balance herself while getting to her feet. But her wobbly knees wouldn’t allow her to stay in that position very long. Reaching over the top of the side railing, she climbed up on top of it.

“Oh, dear Heaven, please don’t let the latches give way now!” she thought, trembling a little.

She swung her body sideways, getting her left leg up and over the railing. Losing her grip and balance, she tumbled out of the crib – clinging to the outside of the side railing and dangling there until she finally lost all grip. Falling to the floor, she landed squarely on her bottom, soggy and thickly padded as it was. The fall only hurt a little, thanks to the diaper.

Standing up, she took one step towards the closet and fell back to the floor – landing on her hands and knees. Standing up again, she took another step forward towards the closet and then fell to her hands and knees once more. Conceding the argument with her legs, she crawled the rest of the way over to the closet and knelt up. Taking hold of the handles of the closet, she pulled on them. But the closet doors didn’t slide apart.

Oh, for Heaven’s sake!

Getting upset once more, she yanked and yanked on the closet door, to no avail, yet again. Shuffling over to the dresser in a kneeling position, she tried to open those drawers – but none of them would budge. This was very bad. She was running out of time and she couldn’t get to her clothes.

And son of a gun, if she hadn’t brought the laundry up from downstairs last night, she would’ve had quite a selection to choose from in the dryer. But nooooooo, she had bring the clothes up and put them all away because her crazy mother would’ve read her the riot act for being a poor housekeeper.

Thanks, Mom. Thanks a lot.

Standing to her feet and holding onto the dresser for balance, she looked over at the only other option of clothing. The changing table had a stack of diapers beneath it. Holly debated going commando for the day, but, being as her diaper was so drenched that she was standing bow-legged just to keep it from sliding down off her hips, putting another diaper on seemed like the only alternative left. She didn’t know why she was wetting herself, but what made her worry about more possible accidents was the fact that she had wet herself twice already and neither time did she realize she was peeing until she felt the wetness between her legs.

Shaking her legs a bit to get them to wake up, she contemplated the commando option again. But it was too risky. God forbid if her mother picked up on the fact that she wasn’t wearing any panties at all.

And not to be forgotten was the fact that Holly had a problem with excitement pee, as she called it – those instances when she just got too excited. But that was usually just a few sprinkles. This was different. Maybe she had some kind of bladder infection or some other condition somewhere in the digestive tract. Whatever it was that was making her pee, she didn’t have time to figure out the catalyst. With seven minutes to go before her relatives proved how prompt they were, Holly shuffled her way over to the changing table.

She picked up a diaper from the stack below and unfolded it, placing it flat on the changing mat. Then she picked up the pack of wipes and the container of powder and set them on the changing table as well. Fumbling with the tapes at her hips, she looked back at the dresser and then to the closet. Why was everything locked?

Pulling on the tapes, she practically tore the sides off – the drenched diaper dropping to the floor between her feet with a thud. She picked up the pack of wipes and took several out of it, looking at the clock again and wiping herself with great haste. She grabbed the container of powder and dumped a liberal amount of it into the inside of the diaper. Then with a big leap, she hopped up onto the changing table and plopped down on the diaper – the powder going everywhere and making a cloud of puff. Welling with tears, she lay down and folded the front of the diaper up, fastening the tapes as tightly at her hips as she could make them.

Hopping down onto her feet, she paused to readjust to the thickness of material in between her legs and by the time she had waddled over to the doorway, she knew she was going to have to walk more slowly – if she was going to pull this off and hide it from her family. It wasn’t going to be easy as her grandparents always squeezed her when they hugged her. With bow-legged movements, it was going to take a Christmas miracle or a Christmas wish to get through this day unscathed. The crinkling noise alone, ever-present in each little sway of her hips, would certainly draw attention to her.

Waddling down the hallway to the upstairs bathroom, Holly found a little more success in walking slowly and concentrating on having grace in her steps. But she felt like she was 13 again, when puberty hit and she suddenly didn’t feel comfortable in her own body for a few years.

Getting to the bathroom and taking the nightie off, she stood in front of the mirror, looking at herself. Though she felt like she was 13, she looked like she was two. And picking up her hair brush, she became lost in thought. Walking over to the bathroom window, she looked down the street – wondering if they were just around the corner. Brushing out her hair, she began to feel incredibly stupid.

How truly stupid this whole thing was, actually. It had been a very weird morning already, but for whatever reason, she had bought into her own insanity. What kind of a solution was it to dress in a diaper? There was bound to be clothing somewhere in the house. And even if she had a bladder infection of some kind that was making her pee suddenly and without warning, she could always excuse herself from the moment and go into the bathroom. It was time to find reality again.

This was dumb and her solution to her problem was just as dumb. Setting the hair brush down on the sink, she reached up to the bathroom mirror, but the mirror wouldn’t open and therefore, she couldn’t get to her make-up. She couldn’t even get to her toothbrush. Thankfully, she wasn’t the kind of girl who wore a lot of make-up – aside from a routine amount of foundation if her complexion seemed it needed it on certain days. And she had never had a cavity in her life. So, skipping the morning brushing of her teeth wouldn’t doom her to an emergency visit to the dentist in her near future. But that wasn’t the point.

Why on Earth wouldn’t her bathroom mirror open up? Jeez! First her bedroom closet and dresser drawers wouldn’t open and now it seemed the same problem existed in her bathroom.

Walking over to the bathroom closet, she sighed as she reached for the knob – hopeful but find that that door wouldn’t open either. Passing the point of frustration, she turned around – leaning against the door, folding her arms and tightening her lips to prevent from crying.

And my goodness, if it was all just dumb and stupid – then why was she crying over it? Waddling out into the hallway and then down the stairs, Holly made her way back to the laundry room – in the hopes that she left some piece of clothing in there last night.

The very moment she walked into the laundry room, she got the first bit of good news that Christmas morning. The red Christmas dress was still hanging there. And how ironic it was that she hung the dress up in disgust towards her mother who would’ve had a cow if her daughter hadn’t done so. But, if Holly actually had folded that dress and put it in the bedroom closet, it would be locked away right now and she would still be scrounging around for anything to wear – at this point.

Slipping into the dress, she made her way into the front room of the downstairs – the living room with the fire place, enormous bay window and presently, a Christmas tree. Plugging the light strands in and walking into the center of the living room, she straightened the dress out on her frame – looking at herself in the mirror above the fireplace mantle. The dress wasn’t cherry red, but it was still a brighter shade of the color. It was modest in appearance – save for one thing … length. But her mother bought the dress, knowing it would be a little short on Holly. So, her mother also bought her a pair of white nylons to go with the dress. Unfortunately, those nylons were locked away in her dresser.

Then, just like that, there was a knock at the door. Holly gasped and spun around. Looking out the bay window, she saw her grandparent’s SUV in the driveway.

When did they get here? She didn’t even hear them. She wasn’t ready. She hadn’t found any make-up to put on and she still didn’t know what to do with her hair. She had bare feet. She wasn’t wearing a bra and she hadn’t taken the diaper off yet.

And aside from all of that, she still hadn’t figured out what was going on here – why someone had changed her bedroom around and why they super-glued all the drawers and doors shut. But her father began pounding on the door as it was really cold outside.

“Holly, sweetheart!” her father called. “Open up! I’m freezing!”

Holly closed her eyes and took in a deep breath, trying to slow the heartbeat that suddenly began pounding so heavily inside her chest she could hardly focus on anything for the fast pulse. Opening her eyes, she blinked a few times – trying to get the room to be bright again. It was like everything was fading to black around her. She felt like she was going to pass out and locking her knees to keep herself up, she tried not to lose her mind.

What was she thinking? Why would she believe for half a second that she could hide anything from her mother? This was such a bad idea, it wasn’t funny.

Her father pounded even harder on the door, forcing Holly to take a small step forward. She spritzed a little more pee into her diaper, the last droplets she had left as she waddled slowly towards the door. Oh, the diaper crinkled so loudly it sounded like it was echoing off the walls and bouncing all over the place. She wasn’t going to fool the six people in her life who actually had changed her diapers a million times.

And that was the moment, as she waddled like a baby, helplessly walking towards a situation she wanted to run away from while also knowing that there was no running away from it – that her mind became overloaded. It wasn’t just from the realization that she was going to have to face her fears, but it was also because déjà vu had suddenly struck her hard.

Her imagination ran wild, trying to avoid the mental duress of the moment and with her foggy eyes, she could see a vision of her father from decades ago as he held his hands out to her to pick her up one Christmas morning when she was very, very young. She remembered waddling aimlessly towards him back then, just the same as he was doing on this Christmas morning.

And as she neared the door, it dawned on her … that letter she had written to Santa with the simple request to be a BabyGirl again for a single day … it had apparently come true!

Gulp.

Continue on to the free release of The Christmas Wish