10 Dynamic Moments: “Bonding Secrets”

Dynamic Moments are points in time when you make discoveries or when you come to conclusions or when you feel the beginnings of something greater than yourself.

During the month of December, I will be writing about 10 such moments.

Here is the fifth:

Bonding Secrets –

How many times has someone said to you:
“Hey, I gotta tell you something but you can’t tell anyone else.”?

Or worse: “Hey, I just heard the craziest thing. You won’t believe it.”
Your response: “What is it?”
Theirs: “I can’t tell you. I promised I wouldn’t say anything to anyone.”

After getting over the impulse to shake them for having said anything to you at all, you eventually learn that what they wanted to say to you really wasn’t all that big of a deal. What actually was the big deal was the promise they made to another to not spread the rumor.

But it was the fact that they showed you that they really wanted to tell you that means the most, in a situation like that. And, because they kept their promise to another by not revealing the juicy story or rumor, you instantaneously hold them in a higher regard of trust.

I’ve often spoken of a girl I met in my third grade class who would change my life forever. But I wouldn’t reveal that story until I was almost 30 years old. (How’s that for keeping a secret?)

But there was another experience I had seven years prior to that which I believe I will never share with anyone.

Secrets are things that we all have. We just choose which ones to share with others. But there are always reasons why we choose particular people to share our secrets with. It’s often because we trust them and hold them in high regard to keep our secret … just that, a secret.

But there has to be a reason before we share the best-kept secrets in our hearts. It’s a bond. There is always some direct link between you and that person.

For a little, so rich with emotion and fueled with sudden openness, I’ve always believed that the secrets within will eventually come out of them. And what scares a little about it sometimes is that they don’t know if the revelation of that secret will be on their terms and when-n-if they decide to share it – or – if it will just come blurting out of them at some random moment.

And what this can lead to is shyness in confessions. A BabyGirl has found and connected and drawn close to a Daddy, to use one specific pairing of roles for example. She is shy about opening her heart for worry that she will be hurt, but still … as her bond with him grows, so does her desire to share all her secrets with him.

And a Daddy’s responsibility, at that moment, is monumentally important – because now she wants to tell Daddy all your secrets. She will give up blackmail-worthy information. And she won’t even realize it sometimes.

Little minds are affected by little things. And for a BabyGirl, there is no such thing as “too much”.
She dreams big about being little. And she confesses the same way. And just like that friend who tells you something that you can’t tell anyone else, a BabyGirl trusts you with everything she has and everything she is.